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It’s not uncommon to encounter manipulative behavior in personal or professional settings and feel confused and hurt by it. While some level of manipulation is present in many people, chronic reliance on lying and deception to achieve personal goals is associated with certain mental health conditions.
Learning to recognize the signs of a manipulative personality and responding to them calmly can reduce your stress and protect you from emotional abuse. In this guide, we will explain what a manipulative personality disorder is, list the main symptoms of this disorder, and offer useful management and treatment tips.
What Is Manipulative Personality Disorder?
Manipulation can be defined as an attempt to control someone or make them behave a certain way by misleading and deceptive means. A person may choose to misrepresent the truth and hide certain facts to gain an advantage in a social situation—for instance, lie about their skills and accomplishments during a job interview to be hired.
There is no specific disorder called “manipulative personality disorder” in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5)—however, manipulative behavior is often linked to personality disorders. Thus, manipulation may be a symptom of narcissistic personality disorder or borderline personality disorder.
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Common Symptoms of Manipulative Personality Disorder
Here are the typical signs of a manipulative personality you should be aware of:
Lack of Empathy
Manipulators do not consider the feelings of other people—they are focused on their own goals and needs even if it means hurting those around them. If you have ever met a seemingly charming individual that never acknowledged your emotions and pain, it is possible they were putting on a facade to get close to you and take advantage of your kindness.
Compulsive Lying
Pay attention to the people in your orbit and the way they speak—if you catch someone lying, whether there was a reason to do so or not, be on your guard when you deal with them in the future. A manipulative person will rarely feel guilty about lying, especially when this behavior brings them benefits.
Blame Shifting
Also known as projection, this behavior occurs when a person refuses to accept their fault and accuses the individual they are speaking to of doing exactly what they have done. For example, a manipulator may cheat on their partner and then blame the partner for being unfaithful to avoid responsibility for their actions.
Emotional and Psychological Impact of Manipulative Behavior
Whether you are a victim of manipulation or you have resorted to this behavior when dealing with others, its effects on a person’s mental health cannot be overstated.
On the surface, a manipulative person may seem joyful and outgoing—nevertheless, when their lies are discovered, their relationships with family, friends, and colleagues will suffer. Constant dishonesty may lead to loneliness, anxiety, and depression.
People that have been manipulated may struggle with low self-esteem, develop an inferiority complex, and have trouble trusting others. If someone in your close circle has been controlling you, it is crucial to reach out to a mental health professional and share your experience to get the help you need.
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How to Deal With a Manipulative Person?
There are several techniques you can implement to protect yourself from a manipulator:
Recognize the Signs of Manipulation
While you should not automatically assume a person is trying to deceive you without a reason, in certain scenarios, catching someone in a lie should be a red flag, especially if they misrepresent facts to paint themselves in a better light.
Do not Engage With the Manipulator
It might be tempting to confront the person that lied to you, but in many cases, it is better to distance yourself from them and cut them off from your life. When a manipulator realizes you have figured them out, they may increase their efforts and involve you in a drawn-out drama.
Reach Out to a Therapist
Even a short period of time spent under the influence of a skilled manipulator may negatively affect your mental health. A certified counselor will listen to your story, validate your feelings, and equip you with coping mechanisms to deal with the stress of being manipulated.
When to Seek Professional Help
If you or someone you care about is exhibiting manipulative behavior described above, therapy can be beneficial. A mental health provider will be able to diagnose any underlying disorders the manipulation stems from and offer personalized treatment to address the issue.
There are various therapy approaches that work well for manipulative personalities—cognitive behavioral therapy to change the negative patterns of thinking, dialectical behavior therapy to manage and control emotions, and group therapy to find support among peers.
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FAQs
What is a manipulative personality?
A manipulative personality is a type of personality characterized by deceptive and controlling behavior—a person lies and withholds information to make other people do what they want.
What are the symptoms of manipulative personality disorder?
The main symptoms of a manipulative personality are a lack of empathy, constantly putting your needs above the feelings of others, compulsive lying, and blame shifting to avoid responsibility.
What are the 7 traits of a manipulative person?
The typical traits of a manipulative individual are the absence of empathy, focus on personal gain, high intelligence, narcissism, a constantly charming demeanor, shrewdness, and skillful lying.
What mental illness causes manipulative behavior?
There is no specific disorder associated with manipulation. Nevertheless, this behavior is often linked to narcissistic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, and antisocial personality disorder.
How do you treat a manipulative personality?
You can help a manipulative person by pointing out the symptoms of their personality and encouraging them to go to therapy. A therapist will be able to diagnose the patient and create a personalized treatment plan for them.
Address Manipulation With Lonestar Mental Health
Whether you have noticed manipulative tendencies in your behavior or realized someone in your household or friend group is lying to you to control your actions, it is important to be on the lookout for the symptoms of a manipulative personality and address this issue before it escalates.
Our team of experts at Lonestar Mental Health is here to help you diagnose Manipulative Personality Disorder and treat it—reach out to us, schedule a therapy session, and talk to a professional to start your journey toward better mental health
